inspectormorose Posted August 3, 2007 Share Posted August 3, 2007 Cricket comparisons got me stumped. Finished it Jimi very very good an all,will give it you back next week at the game.Would have looked at it in a different light (yeah i know that would be with it off and the curtains closed before anyone goes down that route,self smutting can't beat it )had i known of her carpet licking. Just got back off holiday,was up in Argyll by Dunoon.Apparently it's Scotlands best kept secret according to the tourist guff.Yeah and it can stay that way,it's . Inverary,one street town full of shops selling overpriced tartan crap to coachloads of yank tourists in search of their roots.Saw one beauty wearing a kilt over a pair of trousers. First time i've had a week in the lowlands,won't be happening again. Came home a day early so i can fully appreciate the beauty that is our championship winning team (there i've said it) at Macc tomorrow.Noticed on one of my net betting sites they've randomly given me a free 20 quid to play with whilst i've been away.Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm what should i do with that? Luckily i'm off to gods own country for another holiday 2 weeks today but oop north in the proper bit. Random topic,what did you want to be when you grew up when you were a kid.Can't remember if we did this on original big 'un or not but was thinkin' about my childhood whilst daydreaming on the drive home today. Double posting,how good is that,it's an art Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StipeTripe Posted August 6, 2007 Share Posted August 6, 2007 (edited) Flip me this is me third attempt to post. First pooter went bonkers, then after re boot keyboard no work so........ Well all I wanted to say was instead of saying you were off on hols again why didn't you say you were going to bail out IM, eh? Eh? Geddit, bai........ it wasn't worth the reboot ! Yeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa dunnit, I posted the melon farming coke slurper, he said in 'omage to Deadwood. Edited August 6, 2007 by StipeTripe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fleetwood Blue Posted August 7, 2007 Share Posted August 7, 2007 IM THE LAST ONE, WHAT DO I WIN! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddog Posted August 7, 2007 Share Posted August 7, 2007 IM THE LAST ONE, WHAT DO I WIN! Don't come here often, do you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fleetwood Blue Posted August 7, 2007 Share Posted August 7, 2007 are you chatting me up luv? my telephone number is Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StipeTripe Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 Don't come here often, do you? Don't you think its sweet though Mads, when they do turn up, there must be that one nano second where the poster thinks heck if I put "I win" or "I'm last what's the prize" that it seems to be the funniest smartest response that ever been posted on a MB thread entitled "The last one to post wins", D'OH. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leeslover Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 I know Stipey, they never learn. PS, do I win? Oh, I've got a wedding coming up this weekend, over in Yorkshireland. Not by any stretch good timing on the groom's part :trollarse: I can't promise my report will contain as much bizarre incident as last summer's version, as reported in another Big Thread, but you never know. Both of the victims are teachers in their early twenties, meaning there will be loads of totty there ripe for the taking, the groom reckons it will be like shooting fish in a barrel for the single guys there. He reckons without the special abilities of a man who, despite being Best Man, can come away from a wedding weekend without evening managing a consolation one off the wrist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigfinLatic Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 I know Stipey, they never learn. PS, do I win? Oh, I've got a wedding coming up this weekend, over in Yorkshireland. Not by any stretch good timing on the groom's part :trollarse: I can't promise my report will contain as much bizarre incident as last summer's version, as reported in another Big Thread, but you never know. Both of the victims are teachers in their early twenties, meaning there will be loads of totty there ripe for the taking, the groom reckons it will be like shooting fish in a barrel for the single guys there. He reckons without the special abilities of a man who, despite being Best Man, can come away from a wedding weekend without evening managing a consolation one off the wrist. I dont think this board is ready for such tales as your last wedding, back then it was a select few, who were seasoned posters, ready for the shocking things that emerged from your keyboard.... now, with all the new blood, it could seriously damage some people for life... these guys are innocents, who as you say, still believe in the hilarity of an I win post.... I dont believe anything can be a simple weekend for your LL - i'm sure some tales of random vulgarity will come out of it.... or something to do with spending several hundred quid for no real need at all... Speaking of which... have we got a date yet for the Lees Limo trip yet??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leeslover Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 I dont believe anything can be a simple weekend for your LL - i'm sure some tales of random vulgarity will come out of it.... or something to do with spending several hundred quid for no real need at all... As it happens the groom at this one and another lad were very keen streakers back in our Uni days. It's fair to say that they were standing at extreme opposite ends of the line when the naughty bits were being handed out. Little does the groom know that someone has found a picture of him mid streak, on what must have been a very very cold day. You should be thinking of a frozen baby carrot and two garden peas. Several dozen photocopies may appear... And just yesterday I heard that someone has made contact with the other lad, who vanished years ago. It seems that he has got married to one of the girls from our college, but there is some confusion over whether it is Shirley Shovel or Spade Faced Jo. Either way she'll have had a shock on her wedding night, he practically had to stick the end into his sock to stop it rubbing against his shoes. This bloke's party piece was to drink 20 pints and then glass himself in the face. Not the most stable chap. Still, what's the worst that could happen? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StipeTripe Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 Still, what's the worst that could happen? I'm sure come tuesday wednesday you'll be ready to reveal all LL. And don't be telling him to hold back BFL if the lilly livered newbies of this MB can't take LL "colourful" tales then tough! Ohhhhhhh I'm winning Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leeslover Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 Well, luck is running my way. I popped out of the office to get summat for tea before the Sainsburies shut, and got cornered by some bird on a temporary stall in the shopping centre. It took all my willpower to get away on the (true) basis that I'd have nothing to eat if I didn't go then, and I managed to sneak back past her as she locked onto another victim, denying her the chance to finish selling me a box of salt and a small tub of mud for £40. Result. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diego_Sideburns Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 Well, luck is running my way. I popped out of the office to get summat for tea before the Sainsburies shut, and got cornered by some bird on a temporary stall in the shopping centre. It took all my willpower to get away on the (true) basis that I'd have nothing to eat if I didn't go then, and I managed to sneak back past her as she locked onto another victim, denying her the chance to finish selling me a box of salt and a small tub of mud for £40. Result. This is indeed a good omen for Saturday - repelling the bird with the salt/mud (Swan-sea). Shez wants a flying start - 'ere we go - we have lift-off - onwards and upwards! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leeslover Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 This is indeed a good omen for Saturday - repelling the bird with the salt/mud (Swan-sea). Shez wants a flying start - 'ere we go - we have lift-off - onwards and upwards! It was from the Dead Swan-Sea. Them Welsh boys are clearly in some deep trouble Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StipeTripe Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 (edited) This is indeed a good omen for Saturday - repelling the bird with the salt/mud (Swan-sea). Shez wants a flying start - 'ere we go - we have lift-off - onwards and upwards! That has to be the singularly most tenuous omen in the world ever, well done DS Edited August 10, 2007 by StipeTripe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddog Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 I had my brother's set of spare keys while he was away on holiday, so I could move his post, make sure the house was secure, etc etc. The day after they got back, the day of the Macclesfield game, they locked themselves out of the house. No mobile with them, so couldn't call me (not that it would have helped, as I was at Macc anyway). So, after visiting my flat and realising I wasn't there, they proceeded to look for me............ in all the pubs in Rochdale / Royton. Now what does that say about their impression of me? (Added to the fact that they have their 10 year-old calling me Dr Lush - and not in a dodgy incestuous way). Maybe I should change my ways and curb my drinking. Nahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, where's the fun in that!? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigfinLatic Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 As it happens the groom at this one and another lad were very keen streakers back in our Uni days. It's fair to say that they were standing at extreme opposite ends of the line when the naughty bits were being handed out. Little does the groom know that someone has found a picture of him mid streak, on what must have been a very very cold day. You should be thinking of a frozen baby carrot and two garden peas. Several dozen photocopies may appear... And just yesterday I heard that someone has made contact with the other lad, who vanished years ago. It seems that he has got married to one of the girls from our college, but there is some confusion over whether it is Shirley Shovel or Spade Faced Jo. Either way she'll have had a shock on her wedding night, he practically had to stick the end into his sock to stop it rubbing against his shoes. So this is what happens at your "Sedate" weddings then... oh joy.... do all the brides know this before marrying one of your friends...?? that the happiest day of thier lives is going to be turned into a naked-fest, with discussions on poop... This bloke's party piece was to drink 20 pints and then glass himself in the face. Not the most stable chap. Rotherham lad then??? Now what does that say about their impression of me? (Added to the fact that they have their 10 year-old calling me Dr Lush - and not in a dodgy incestuous way). Maybe I should change my ways and curb my drinking. White Hart for 11 tomorrow then??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leeslover Posted August 13, 2007 Share Posted August 13, 2007 Weddings make head hurt. Me no feel so good. I managed to lose the jacket from my £500 suit (a relic of my time working for Crombie) and also lost the tree that I stole from my old University college to punish them for turning the bar into a reading room. The groom lost the power of speech, unfortunately during his speech, and just stood there being smashed for several minutes, and a Welshman played an invisible piano for several songs, and my friend who I was getting a lift off accidentally followed through on the way back, but it was pretty uneventful on the whole. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddog Posted August 13, 2007 Share Posted August 13, 2007 Had a training day at the hospital today. I always park on Furtherwood Road when I have summat on at the hospital - mainly so I can see the comings and going at the club (I'm easily amused ). But, imagine my delight when I was treated to Neil Kilkenny prancing across the road in just a pink towel round his bottom half to get something from his car (literally - no shoes or anything ), and then it fell off, and I was then treated to Neil Kilkenny prancing back across the road in just a pair of gruds ! I almost choked on mi tuna butty ! I think he might be my new favourite player Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StipeTripe Posted August 14, 2007 Share Posted August 14, 2007 Had a training day at the hospital today. I always park on Furtherwood Road when I have summat on at the hospital - mainly so I can see the comings and going at the club (I'm easily amused ). But, imagine my delight when I was treated to Neil Kilkenny prancing across the road in just a pink towel round his bottom half to get something from his car (literally - no shoes or anything ), and then it fell off, and I was then treated to Neil Kilkenny prancing back across the road in just a pair of gruds ! I almost choked on mi tuna butty ! I think he might be my new favourite player Do you think he'd be the longest in the shower the Mads Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddog Posted August 14, 2007 Share Posted August 14, 2007 Do you think he'd be the longest in the shower the Mads Only had a behind shot, Stipe, but if everything's in proportion, I'd probably say he'd be the shortest in the shower Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StipeTripe Posted August 14, 2007 Share Posted August 14, 2007 Only had a behind shot, Stipe, but if everything's in proportion, I'd probably say he'd be the shortest in the shower Mind its always cold in Oldham, so he's got that excuse Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddog Posted August 14, 2007 Share Posted August 14, 2007 Mind its always cold in Oldham, so he's got that excuse Shouldn't go fannying around with nowt but a pink (??) towel and briefs on then! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest sheridans_world Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 Shouldn't go fannying around with nowt but a pink (??) towel and briefs on then! As discussed on Tuesday night, the apperance of baby blue boots doenst help his cause! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddog Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 Just had this in an email from my mum...... Just had a mirth-filled moment I want to share with you. Your dad is in the lounge doing karaoke to himself, singing "You ain't nothin but a hound dog" in his shorts, white ankle socks and grandad slippers, rocking to it...picture the scene!!! luv mum xxx Brits abroad, eh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leeslover Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 A few days ago, a senior manager asked me for a list of some data. He then played about with it and sent it on to one of his supervisors, asking her to check things from the list to see if we had a potential problem. She delegated this to one of her staff. It came back today with results that suggested that we had a very much more serious and completely different problem. Immediate panic strikes, as me, the manager and our IT guy try to figure out what is up. Eventually we conclude that my source data must have been wrong. I am the mug who has wasted everyone’s time. Then, I realise that the returned list we are panicing over isn’t the same as what I sent – the manager must have arsed it up. Cue jubilant gloating from me, telling him that he’s my bitch and that I own him for a month. However, I do suggest he checks what he sent over in the first place, this turns out to be OK – hence the supervisor has cocked it up. Cue jubilant gloating from him. But no, it was the temp she gave the work to had managed to completely arse up the spreadsheet she was working on, hence the wacky outcomes. There is a saying somewhere about if you want something doing properly… I don’t need the tinternet to prevent me doing any useful work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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